Setting Yourself Free from Striving

Introduction

At one point in my life I was so drained emotionally and physically I realized that I needed to sit down with God and evaluate the areas in my life where I was striving and felt stuck. I sensed God give me permission to say no to the things that caused me to over-function and perform for love. All the expectations I thought God had of me were expectations that I put on myself or external pressures around me that God never permitted me to do or asked me to take part in. When my kids were little I often told them to say “My parents won’t allow me to do that” if someone wanted them to participate in something that they weren’t comfortable with. Can we approach our Heavenly Father the same way? When you put your time into God’s hands amazing things happen. And there is so much freedom to be able to say “My Dad said I’m not allowed to do that!”.  Below is a prayer I wrote to help you gain freedom from living a life of striving and perfectionism and permitting yourself to say no.

Prayer to Expand Your Time

Today I give myself permission to enter into God’s rest. As an act of my will, I will allow God be in control of my time and my priorities today. I will open my eyes to the needs of others and allow God to use me to bless someone else today. I commit to not worry about the things that happen that are out of my control. I believe that as I give God permission to control my schedule, He will expand my time. I give myself permission to add self care to my “have to do” list every day. I believe that when I give my time over to God He will increase and expand it. 

Strategies to expanding your time:

Make a to do list and separate each item into “have to do’s”, “should do’s”, and “want to do’s”. Take some time to pray over this list and have a truthful conversation with God about anything on your “have to do” section that doesn’t line up with what the Holy Spirit says you have to do. Did God say that you have to do that or are you doing it because you are being pressured internally or externally to do it? 

Ask yourself if any of your “have to do’s” can be delegated to someone else. This is a difficult one for people like me (Enneagram 2) who have a hard time asking for help! But there are a lot of people around you that see you when you are bogged down and want to help! They just need you to give them permission to step in. 

Identify the things in your life that are depleting you. Give yourself permission to say no! 

Add at least an hour of “delight” on your “have to do” list every day. (delight is something that fills you and brings you joy like working out, taking a walk, going on a bike ride, getting a massage, having dinner with friends etc.) 

Schedule a vacation every quarter. It doesn’t have to be long or extravagant. Just something that forces you into rest and out of reach of people who want things from you. 

Spend less time with the people who want something from you and spend more time with people who just let you be you!

Books that have helped me in this area:

Ordering Your Private World by Gordon McDonald

The Ruthless Elimination of Hurry by John Mark Comer

Do you need extra help? 

Book a coaching session with me! 

Order my book Desert Grace Contemplative Prayers for Emotional Healing & Reflection Journal: Volume 1 

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